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Tips On Living With Your Ex-Spouse After Divorce

Some couples continue living together after divorce – often for reasons related to parenting time, finances, or both. There are also reasons that you got a divorce in the first place, which is going to make cohabitating a bit more challenging. Fortunately, there are tips that can help. 

Set a Clear Time Limit

If you’re living together post-divorce, there’s a reason, and the plan should not be permanent. Set a clear time limit regarding the arrangements and let this guide you. For example, if your arrangements are based on finances, determine how long it’s going to take to resolve the issue and set that as your end date. 

Set Clear Boundaries

You’re both going to need your own space if you’re going to successfully cohabitate after divorce. If you don’t have enough space for each of you to have your own bedroom and bathroom, moving to separate floors or separate areas of your home can help.

Set Clear Ground Rules

Set clear ground rules that make sense for you and your ex. Generally, putting the kibosh on bringing dates home is a good place to start, but you should implement whatever rules make sense to you.

Put Your Kids First

Divorce may be even harder on your kids than it is on you, and they have absolutely no control over what is going on, which leaves them that much more vulnerable. Make your children’s best interests your guide regarding every decision you make – keeping all the following in mind:

  • Be honest with your children about your arrangements.
  • Remember that if you can’t treat your ex with reasonable kindness and respect, living with your ex after divorce is more likely to cause your children pain.
  • Discuss your own emotional challenges appropriately – with friends, family members, loved ones, or professionals outside your home.
  • Take your children’s input into careful consideration. If they like how things are working out, consider yourself a success story, but if not, determine what changes you can make to help.
  • Schedule time for each of you to be alone with the kids at home.

Clearly Divide Household Responsibilities

Perhaps your household responsibilities are already clearly divided – in exactly the same way they were while you were married – and perhaps that works well for you. If not, however, it’s time to make a plan regarding who will be doing what. The more stress you can resolve upfront, the better chance you have of making this experiment in cohabitation a success. 

Reach Out To An Experienced Illinois Divorce Attorney Today

The compassionate Illinois divorce attorneys at WARD FAMILY LAW recognize that every divorcing couple has their own unique issues and concerns that they need to resolve in accordance with their own priorities, and we’re here to help you find the right path for you – while protecting your financial and parental rights in the process. We are on your side and here to help, so please don’t wait to contact us for more information today.



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